TIRED, OLD AND BALD | Perich Advertising + Design

TIRED, OLD AND BALD

By Ernie Perich

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32 Reasons I know I’m a tired, old, bald ad hack.

  1. I could care less about any of the 4,000 award competitions.
  2. I enjoy solving the problems of an industrial supply chain company as much as the problems of a golf course or shoe manufacturer.
  3. I loathe traveling to photo shoots, film shoots and the like. Not impressed with catering at these events any more either.
  4. I actually wore suspenders a couple of times in the mid-80s.
  5. I don’t have a problem with moderately big type.
  6. I’m not afraid to admit that my brain doesn’t function as well in the afternoon.
  7. I’ve learned that in the long run, attitude trumps talent in this business.
  8. I’ll bet attitude trumps talent in other businesses.
  9. I remember when social media actually involved people talking to one another. With their mouths.
  10. I’ve actually learned the power of keeping my mouth shut.
  11. I’ve learned my mouth is actually bigger that most, so keeping it shut requires more effort.
  12. I’ve stopped commenting on other firms’ work unless asked.
  13. I’m in a men’s breakfast club.
  14. Some actually eat prunes with their bacon.
  15. And talk about Naples. Not the one in Italy.
  16. I’ve mastered the craft of avoiding too-long meetings. It keeps me young.
  17. My desk currently has little boxes with the 21 vitamins and supplements I take every day.
  18. I limp a lot.
  19. When I can’t get email on my iPhone, somebody 25 years younger than me always comes to my rescue.
  20. Where the hell are my reading glasses?
  21. Loyalty means more to me every day.
  22. I’ve grown tired of people who think they’re smarter than me.
  23. I’ve grown to admire people who really are smarter than me but make me feel a genius.
  24. I’ve accepted the fact that “truly remarkable” is rarer than I once believed it was.
  25. I actually get a kick out of the age-old conflicts between creative and account people. Like listening to a song for the 1,000th time.
  26. I miss the time I used to have to think before Steve Jobs compressed everything.
  27. I also have Kashi Go Lean Crunch on my desk.
  28. And I actually know, and care, that it provides 32% of my daily fiber.
  29. I remember when waxing was something you did to type.
  30. I still think best after a cup of coffee, with a pen and a pad of paper and my feet propped up on the desk like they are right now.
  31. But getting by feet back down can be difficult.
  32. I’ve accepted the fact that working for free now and again (spec work) ain’t going away during my lifetime.